her status goes: "dont tell me its okay when you havnt gone through it and you dont know how it feels."
so. i've been hearing this a lot. and by a lot of different people. and...coming from the perspective where a lot of people come to me for comfort, i tend to say "it's going to be ok" a lot. because guess what? it will be fucking ok. you may be struggling now, it may hurt a lot now, but in the end, life goes on, and if you can't go with the flow...maybe life for you shouldn't go on anymore. sounds horrible, but it's the truth.
and another thing, what i hear when people say this is that they are wishing this pain, and this horrible situation upon someone else. and that's unforgivable. "you don't know how much pain i'm in until you go through it then you'll see that nothing is going to be ok" it really sounds like..."i hope you go through this yourself so you can feel the pain i am feeling." you may not mean it like that. but that's what i'm hearing. there are things that people do not and cannot understand, and you have to understand that sometimes when you cannot understand your friends' pain, but you simply know that they are in pain. you don't know how to help them out but you want to help them out. you don't know what to say, but you want to say something.
does pain need a predecessor in order for there to be healing? does someone have to understand your pain in order for you to talk to them about it? you don't need someone to guide you through how to get through the pain, you sometimes just need someone there. open your eyes and just see the support that they have for you. if they didn't love you, they wouldn't give a damn enough to even listen to you bitch and moan about your life, so stop being such a dumbass and appreciate a friend sometimes.
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